Friday, November 5, 2010

Dear Super Nanny

Dear Super Nanny,

Your show fascinates me for so many reasons.  First of all, I used to wonder (that is before I had 3 boys), where do you ever find these people??  Now I realize, I am one of those people.  I could actually use you all the time, you seem to handle little boys pretty well.   Perhaps you'd like a new full time gig?  You came to the Chicagoland area last year and I even had some humorous emails from great friends suggesting that perhaps my family should go to the auditions.  But I'm not much of a reality TV gal, and certainly don't want to show off all our wonderful behaviors for all the world to see.  So instead, every once in a while I catch a glimpse of your show, and it makes me feel SO much better..... because what's usually going on over doesn't involve spitting or cursing in my face thank goodness.  Not that I'm judging, because I'm not.  No one ever warns you how hard raising kids is actually going to be. 

Here's the things Super Nanny... you swoop in with your English accent and pretty much change everything in a matter of a few days.  Now I know this makes for great TV, and I'm assuming your accent and expertise has helped you in the financial department.  I don't mean to be rude or disrespectful to your talents, but your show just doesn't seem REAL to me.  You see Super Nanny, on your show, you are always there to change things up a bit.  But here's the is the mom, and the dad, {who has somehow managed to take a paid leave from work to stay home and work on his parenting skills (every man's dream vacation I'm sure).}   The camera people are also there, and often other family members are there.  There's usually at least one or two adults there for every child present.   I've never seen you try to manage 3-4 unruly children on camera without anyone else present. I'm not saying you can't do it, your accent alone can probably move mountains.  I'm just saying that you make it look easy because it is much easier when you aren't OUTNUMBERED.

Now before you start getting defensive, please know that I've planted many little bodies safely back in their beds without looking at or speaking to them. Most of the time, when they were still in cribs, this was a complete failure. My boys can probably climb Mount Everest, and  they could certainly scale their cribs by 18 months. (Have you ever heard of a crib tent Super Nanny??? Best 75$ you will ever spend, just thought you may want my advice).   I've also used your "naughty chair or naughty step" more times than I can count.  Now since my boys are can't stay still longer than 1 minute and 32 seconds, the naughty chair turned out to be impossible to pull off.  What was I supposed to do with the other two while the accused was in the naughty chair? My children are quite bright I must say, and they certainly know how to take advantage of a busy mommy trying to get their brother to sit in the naughty chair for his allotted time.  When I am manning the chair, the other two are running around the house like wild Indians, doing things they know they shouldn't be doing.  All the while I keep putting the accused back in the chair, trying very hard to sound stern and English.  This ends up being a very vicious cycle, and usually ends with one very cranky mommy, two children running completely unsupervised around the house, and one accused brother laughing because he has realized that his mommy can't possibly keep him in the chair without worrying about the damage the other two are causing. 

And you know what else Super Nanny?  I have NEVER seen a parent on your show do a load of laundry, mow the grass, scrub the toilet, unload the dishwasher, pack lunches, or even do so much as check the mail. Perhaps the personal staff you bring for the week takes care of all that while the parents are just brushing up on their parenting strategies?  So you see, I do love your show for entertainment purposes, and I even learn a thing or two sometimes.   But it's not real.  I'm just saying.  Next time you are in town, come to my house ALONE.  I will leave you here for a few days and go off on a wonderful vacation like on Extreme Makeover, Home Addition.  When I come back, I want a pristine house, laundry done, and 3 perfectly polite behaved little boys.  Thank you very much.


Mom of Captain Competitive, Good Time Charlie, and SirWhineAlot


  1. Nicely said!! One of my best offers to Ben's speech therapist is to just take him home for a week instead of the 52 weekly visits and I was sure to get back a different kid. Only problem....There are 51 more weeks in the year and 24 hours more in each day. UGH! You too could do IT for someone else's family for a 48 hour period. Its always easy to tell what is going wrong....Its keeping it up to make it right that's hard work. Pam Tepper

  2. Well said Steph! As one who used the family bed when her son was little, I am offended when she says how bad it is for the child and the parents. You know my child, and I don't think it has harmed him in anyway! And it gave us some of our best memories of a little boy who is now starting to look at colleges!